Sunday, February 26, 2012

The Route to Redlands

It's no secret that AAA's Westways magazine is the biggest waste of paper since my first screenplay.

But to add insult to tree cutting, this month they feature Redlands as a potential day trip destination.

Deep Throat 101

I recently discovered UCLA offers a course on pornography.

I knew I should have gone undergrad on the west coast.

Friday, February 24, 2012


Is anyone else annoyed this whole Linsanity thing has to do with basketball and not Lindsay Lohan?

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Mercado Madness

The economy is so bad, even the 99 cent store had to lower prices.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Bubblebath Beauty

Regardless of religious or political preferences, I think we can all agree...

The last thing anybody needs to witness is Jessica Simpson lounging in a tub full of diamonds.

23 (part 1)

In this month's Vogue, Adele jokingly said she was taking five years off to foster her relationship with her new boyfriend.

After selling her last boyfriend down the river to such financial gain, I'm shocked she found another chap willing to supply more fodder.

23 (part 2)

Adele is so in love, she believes her next record will be "happy."

My heart wishes her relationship well, my ears wish her relationship much anguish.