Showing posts with label Not Approved / Secretly Approved. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Not Approved / Secretly Approved. Show all posts

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Never Upstage Miley Cyrus

I can't believe Obama is attempting to upstage the Mtv VMAs tonight. The audacity's gone to his head.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Skinny Bastard

This manifesto asks women not to be a fat pig...

...but not to become anorexic either.

To assume women can find a happy medium between the two, leads me to believe this was actually written by a clueless straight man.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

This Smile is Bananas

The summer time Banana Republic model appears a tad too excited about her money, good looks, and Croatian vacation plans.

Until autumn arrives, I'm cheating on her with J.Crew.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Philandering Phone

Owning a Blackberrry is like dating a politician.

If left out of your sight without locking him down, he will sext people without your permission.

Friday, April 20, 2012

Administrative Professionals Day? Part 1

Magnolia is making up fake holidays to keep us feening for their buttercream.

Administrative Professionals Day? Part 2

This made up holiday offers office drones an excuse to buy proper Magnolia items for 4.20. Smart.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Rising Sun

Being the anthropologist I am, I couldn't leave Japan without thoroughly examining an anime porn magazine.

These femme fatales did things even the cast of the Jersey Shore would find disturbing.

My research made me proud to live in the land of Showtime and Hustler.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Mad Republic

Banana Republic has finally proven a theory I've held for years, Mad Men is kinda lame. Sorry, Peggy.

I'll still buy half the catalogue in a pathetic attempt to look like Hamm's Draper, even though I'm clearly more a Redford's Gatsby.

Monday, July 25, 2011

How Sue "C's" It

If I have to read

one more thing

about who's graduating in season three

I'm going to transfer out of William McKinley and leave Lima behind.

Starting to understand why Sue hates them.

Monday, May 23, 2011

LA Sports

In 2005, the Kitson Boutique on Robertson Blvd. made headlines with Team Aniston and Team Jolie t-shirts, selling for ninety dollars a pop.

Now, Kitson is hoping to make money off infidelity once more with Team Maria.

These shirts don't even make sense:
a. Bodybuilding is not a team sport.
b. Nobody with any class would buy a Team Arnold shirt.

...Then again, if it read Team Terminator I might be able to find an extra ninety lying about.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Scent of a Douche

The pour homme ads in this month's Vanity Fair gave me a headache. Like Paula Cole, I wonder Where Have All The Cowboys Gone, who don't peddle over the counter cologne?

No on the nipple unless in Malibu, Mr. McConnaughy.

Refrain from frolicking unless on General Hospital, Mr. Franco.