Showing posts with label Get Your Gay On / Not Approved. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Get Your Gay On / Not Approved. Show all posts

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Mickey's Mistake

Leave it to Disney to make me feel bad about my single gay status.

You just lost my pink dollars.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Hard To Pronounce Drugs

This new drug targets the excess belly fat of HIV positive men.

Thanks to this insensitive advert, men with HIV feel pressured to stay beautiful. And every time I bloat, I feel pressured to visit the free clinic.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Long Beach Pride

Don't know which offends me more, gay people thinking I'm a lesbian or gay people believing I live in Long Beach?

Friday, October 29, 2010

Pathetic Poster Boy

The bad thing about being gay is you receive birthday cards such as these, usually reserved for post-menopausal women.

These cards stir pity inside my soul. If I owned abs, I would be the lead, or Courtney's boy toy on Cougar Town, or at the very least a walk on role in a telenovela. I would not let my crunches accumulate to posing in an unbottoned orange silk short sleeve dress shirt for $200 dollars.

His whole situation is too sad to be sexy. Don't even get me started on his whitewashed jeans.

Monday, October 25, 2010

A Bad Idea, from Top to Bottom

I joined to meet my future husband, sure I like chick flicks and pink, but I can't tell my grandkids we met at a blind Bottoms event.

Consider this my 'Not Attending' RSVP. Though I will forward the invite to my on-again/off-again cuddle bear, 50 Cent.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Positively Not

Yesterday I received this Meet Up email inviting all HIV Positive gay people who live in the O.C. to get together for some drinks. Okay, someone is spreading vicious rumors about me; I do not live in the O.C.!

Also, for any potential suitors out there, rest assure with my recent rendezvous, it would take an act of Oprah for me to have a cold sore, let alone HIV.

Monday, September 20, 2010

The Big Gay Kindle Cult

As a guy who likes to read and sniff books, I'm obviously single. I joined recently to branch out the limbs of my Sycamore to encompass some new leafs, but per the Meetup evite below, no one wants a book sniffer.

Only eReaders! No Print Books?

Pride is still Pride and Prejudice is still Prejudice regardless of how one reads his literature. Do I really need an iPad to eat Brie, feign interest in Dickens, and pontificate about gay subtext? This elitist injustice is enough to make me fantasize about Little Women.