Showing posts with label Straight People / Not Approved. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Straight People / Not Approved. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Cougar Cruise

Just when you think Norwegian Cruise Line can't get more trashy, they hike their sails higher.

The Norwegian Sky is set to embark on it's third Cougar Cruise; only younger men and older women may join the buffet. Something tells me Courtney Cox will not be sipping Malbec on the sundeck.

These men better read Life of Pi before they board!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

No One Asked for Your 50 Cent!

After four teen suicides, 50 Cent tweeted:

“If you a man and your over 25 and you don’t eat pu**y just kill your self damn it. The world will be a better place. Lol.”

If he can guarantee God doesn't have the song Candy Shop on her itune heaven mix, I might consider his proposal.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Date Night

To the straight couples holding Prop 8 anti-gay marriage signs outside the San Francisco courthouse today, seek marriage counseling; date night should not involve foam board and sharpies.

P.S. don't use a restroom within ten miles of the courthouse; you never know what the gays have done in there.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Hide Your Lebowski

Straight People,

Stop displaying your DVDs on bookshelves as if they're John Steinbeck novels. DVDs belong like a 12 year old gay boy growing up in Omaha: in the closet, covered by a J.Crew peacoat, with the door tightly closed.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

No Bustiers Allowed

Being the token fag hag at the gay club does not translate to being cast in a Mariah Carey video.

This note goes out to you, Ecstasy. Yes, you've earned a nick name from a stranger (never a good sign) for prancing around in your black bustier* like some drugged out Selena.

Where's Yolanda Saldivar when you need her?

*(it was almost as disturbing as my wannabe Julia Roberts photo...see below)